


We’re collecting moments, tattoos on my mind

by Toomanyfandoms99



Series: (No Longer A) Secret Marriage [36]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, M/M, Secret Marriage, Soul Bond
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-15
Updated: 2018-09-15
Packaged: 2019-07-12 17:04:28
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,174
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15999569
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Toomanyfandoms99/pseuds/Toomanyfandoms99
Summary: “Are you sure about this, Mom?”Mary nodded to Dean as they neared John’s cell.  “If Bobby says he’s alright, I’ll talk to him.”





	We’re collecting moments, tattoos on my mind

**Author's Note:**

> The title is taken from the song “Sometimes” by Ariana Grande, indicated with ellipsis. I also included a reprise of “Green Eyes” by Coldplay. Enjoy!

It had taken lots of convincing, but Bobby eventually agreed to visit John in Heaven’s prison.

He was brought there by a group consisting of Dean, Castiel, Mary, and Balthazar. They decided to stay by the prison entrance while Bobby went to speak with John.

Bobby was skeptical when Dean reported that the father and son had a civil conversation slash inquisition. Bobby was sure that Dean wouldn’t even bother with his father anymore. But John was determined to remain in Heaven after he came through Hell’s temporary rift. According to Mary and Dean, John would do whatever it took to maintain a relationship with his oldest son and mend his relationship with his wife.

Bobby finally decided that he would speak to John as his old best friend, the only person John allowed to care for his two sons. He would see where John stood on certain matters, and help John understand how the world has changed.

John’s reaction upon seeing Bobby was comical. Bobby drawled, “boy, no one’s been excited to see me unless I’ve come to help hide a monster carcass.”

“Bobby,” John said in disbelief. “I’m so glad to see you!”

“Good for you,” Bobby said gruffly, sitting in a chair across from John’s cell. “I can’t believe I’m missing reruns for this.”

John smiled, and it reminded Bobby so much of Dean’s old cocky smirk that he almost forgot who he was talking to. “I can’t believe you outlived me, old man.”

“I got really fuckin’ old,” Bobby said. “But that’s not what I’m here to talk to you about.”

John nodded thoughtfully. “My sons. Yes.”

“The world has changed a great deal since you died,” Bobby said. “You missed two-thirds of Dean and Sam’s lives. Decades. You missed several supernatural wars and countless near-death experiences and events that should’ve ended the world, but didn’t. All because of your sons constantly saving it.”

“You’re saying they’re heroes.”

“Yes. In every sense of the word.”

John was quiet for a few beats, taking this in. “Where do their marriages factor into this?”

Bobby was surprised at the lack of harshness in John’s tone. Instead, it had taken on a pensive quality, as if John was uploading information and considering it carefully. Bobby replied, “Dean changed when he met Castiel. I knew he was in love, but Dean didn’t know it himself until years later. The boys had known Gabriel, but it took Sam over a decade to fall for him.” A beat. “Cas has helped Dean more than you will ever know. They had their issues, but they figured it out. I can hardly even explain them, the connection they have. It’s surely not of this world.” Bobby half-smiled at his awful joke. “I watched your boys fall in love with angels, in a world that still believed as you believe. But the world has become more accepting. Sexuality and gender are far more complicated than you think.”

“The Scottish guy said it was a spectrum.”

“Balthazar?” Bobby asked. “Yeah, that sounds about right.”

John scoffed. “His name is Balthazar?”

“It’s a douchebag name, I know,” Bobby agreed. “He’s not so bad. Angels all seem snobbish at first, but that’s just their hard outer shells.”

“Even,” John spoke the name for the first time aloud, “Castiel?”

“Yes, but he wasn’t as bad as his brothers.” Bobby chuckled at memories John wasn’t privy to. “He was mostly just curious. Angels didn’t used to come to Earth often.”

“I see. Can you explain this whole spectrum thing?”

Bobby, once again, was surprised by John’s openness to hearing different viewpoints. “From what I understand, there are different types of sexuality. You aren’t just gay or straight. Your sons are attracted to both males and females. Or, in their case, anything in between, such as angels.”

The last sentence caused John to furrow his eyebrows.

Bobby continued, “gender is considered a spectrum as well. For supernatural beings like angels, they are created as a neutral gender, neither male nor female. The angels are developed enough after being created to choose their gender. It becomes increasingly more complicated when they choose to inhabit a human body. Despite their gender being, say, female, the female’s human body could be male. Appearance doesn’t matter to angels.” A beat. “At least that’s what Cas told me when I asked once.”

John absorbed this information for a long moment. Bobby thought of when he asked Cas about this matter in the bunker library. It had resulted in Castiel educating anyone who would listen on the topic. Bobby could tell it weirded Dean out for a moment, but he quickly got over his inhibitions and accepted it.

“I suppose that makes sense,” John muttered. “Bobby, tell me: what’s your consensus on Castiel?”

“You tryna see if he’s good enough for your son?” Bobby laughed. “You should be asking if your son is good enough for Castiel.”

John was quiet for a beat. “You’re saying-”

“Cas is a far better man than you must think. I hold him in the highest esteem. Dean’s the one that married up in their relationship. Cas compliments Dean well; it’s like that yin and yang shit, that soulmate shit. They’ll make you believe all that hooey is for real.”

“You’ve gone soft, old man,” John said jokingly.

“I’m serious, John. Dean and Sam both did good.”

John nodded in consideration.

————

“You were right,” Bobby said to Dean as they left the prison. “He’s quite...receptive.”

“Well, that’s a relief,” Mary said.

Dean intertwined Cas’s hand in his, hope flooding his insides.

————

Dean turned on the shower in their cabin and stepped inside. They technically didn’t need to shower or do menial tasks in Heaven, but Dean liked to. He closed the shower curtain and started to sing.

...I’ve never been so caught up, still so into us. I never thought I’d be here, should’ve turned to dust. Ooh, let’s be honest, baby, this is so unusual. Ooh, and I’m not tempted, baby, even if they’re beautiful. I used to be cautious, a little too reckless. Now all my emotions are all cause of you…

Cas had taken Dean to a part of Heaven that contained every song ever recorded on Earth the previous day. Dean was so ecstatic that he spent hours listening to seventies and eighties rock, much to the amusement of Cas. After Dean had his fun revisiting old classics, Cas spent time searching for a specific song. It was one that Charlie used to play for Cas. It was a silly pop song, but Cas said he liked it, so Dean listened and soaked it up. It had gotten so lodged into his brain that he resorted to singing it in the shower to get it out of his head.

...I ain’t even think of leaving sometimes, I ain’t even think of letting go. I ain’t ever thought of going nowhere, I don’t even see it down the road. ‘Cause we’re collecting moments, tattoos on my mind. I ain’t even think of leaving sometimes, I ain’t even think of letting go. Not even sometimes...

Dean supposed this song was romantic in its own way. It was about commitment and true love, something Dean knew a lot about. 

...Ooh, let’s be honest, baby, this is so unusual. Ooh, I’m not tempted, baby, even if they’re beautiful. It used to be easy for someone to steal me. Now all my emotions are all cause of you, boy. I ain’t even think of leaving sometimes, I ain’t even think of letting go. I ain’t ever thought of going nowhere, I don’t even see it down the road. ‘Cause we’re collecting moments, tattoos on my mind. I ain’t even think of leaving sometimes, I ain’t even think of letting go. Not even sometimes, babe…

Dean finished washing his body and put shampoo in his hands, ready to wash his hair. He sang his favorite part of the song.

...I don’t know, I don’t know, I don’t know why it never worked, but it’s going to now. You don’t know, you don’t know, you don’t know what it does to me when I feel you around. Is it love? Is it lust? Is it fear? But it’s hard to breathe when you’re touching me there, hard to breathe when you’re kissing me there, hard to breathe when you’re not here…

Dean washed his soapy hair quickly and hummed the next part of the song to himself.

...I ain’t even think of leaving sometimes, I ain’t even think of letting go. I ain’t ever thought of going nowhere, I don’t even see it down the road. ‘Cause we’re collecting moments, tattoos on my mind. I ain’t even think of leaving sometimes, I ain’t even think of letting go. Not even sometimes. Not even sometimes…

Over the shower spray, Dean heard the door click open. His sleepy husband had finally woken up. He finished his song in a softer register.

…’Cause we’re collecting moments, tattoos on my mind. I ain’t even think of leaving sometimes, I ain’t even think of letting go. Not even sometimes...

Dean smiled a little and turned off the shower. He materialized a towel to wrap around his waist. He stepped out of the shower to see a yawning Cas leaning against the opposite wall. Dean grinned and glided towards him. Cas looked up at Dean with half-lidded eyes, watching him dazedly in a copy of Dean’s old bunker robe. The sight brought back all sorts of beautiful memories.

“Good morning, darlin’,” Dean drawled. He pressed Cas against the wall lightly and kissed him lazily. Cas hummed, becoming more awake with each long kiss. After a moment of sucking Cas’s face, Dean murmured, “I’m sorry if I woke you.”

“It’s okay. Your singing is a lovely way to wake up,” Cas said, his voice still rough from sleep but his eyes alert.

“Yeah?” Dean asked breathily.

Cas hummed and kissed Dean again, placing his hands on Dean’s bare chest. “The nakedness is nice too.”

Dean chuckled. “Get outta my robe and take a shower, gorgeous. We’ve got a big day ahead.”

Cas sighed but acquiesced. Dean watched with bated breath as Cas turned the shower back on and slipped off his robe, letting the material flit to the floor.

It took all of Dean’s willpower to tear his eyes away from Cas’s glorious backside as Cas disappeared behind the curtain.

————

“Are you sure about this, Mom?”

Mary nodded to Dean as they neared John’s cell. “If Bobby says he’s alright, I’ll talk to him.”

“Cas and I will be close by if you feel uncomfortable and wanna leave,” Dean reminded her.

“I should be okay,” Mary said, stopping at the neighboring cell next to John’s. She stood across from them, looking up at the two men. She smiled genuinely and said, “thank you for doing this. You’re both wonderful.”

“Don’t tell him that,” Castiel chided. “His ego will inflate to dangerous levels.”

Dean swatted Cas’s arm and blushed. “Stop it,” he said weakly.

Mary chuckled. “You two are a hoot. I feel much better about this already.”

Dean and Castiel shared a look. Then, Dean said warily, “we’re glad we can help?”

Mary smiled. “I’ll be fine, boys.”

“We’ll still be here,” Dean said, allowing Mary to walk to John’s cell.

Dean squeezed Castiel’s hand and hesitantly gave his parents extra space.

————

John perked up, standing by the cell bars as Mary appeared across from him.

“Hi, Mary,” John said, uncharacteristically soft.

“John,” Mary greeted. “Why did you wish to see me?”

“You’re my wife. I-I’d like to see you, i-if that’s okay.”

A stammering John. Mary thought that was very interesting. He had changed his tune bit-by-infinitesimal-bit since his arrival in Heaven. “I can visit, if you behave.”

John beseeched, “I’m trying to understand, Mary. I am.”

Mary’s face fell. “Me too. There’s still so much I don’t know.”

“W-We can share information, if you like.”

Mary knew John would do anything to make her stay and keep talking to him. If John valued anything, it was his marriage to Mary. She felt like a fool for being intrigued by his sentence, but her curiosity was endless. John knew that. 

Mary said, “you mean childhood stories.” 

She read flashbacks in the fantasy novels Dean had gifted her, but she hadn’t gotten through all of them yet. A mere documented five years in her sons’ lives was taxing enough to read on its own. Mary could only imagine what else her boys had been through.

“Yes,” John replied. “And you can tell me what you know. We can work together to try and understand.”

The idea was appealing to Mary. She would do whatever it took to know more about Dean and Sam. Mary didn’t want to spend too much time around John, though. She still hadn’t forgiven him, and she probably never will. But, again, her curiosity was what killed the cat. And her.

“We can trade one story every few days,” Mary said, setting her terms. “I have other things to do, and can’t come here every day.”

John chose not to pry, even though he desperately wanted to, judging from his expression. “Okay. Can we begin with one now?”

Mary materialized a chair and sat. “Okay. Once upon a time, God brought me back to Earth.”

“What?!”

“If we’re doing this, no interrupting,” Mary said in a clipped tone.

John was silent.

Mary started again. “Once upon a time, God brought me back to Earth. It was a gift to Dean and Sam, after stopping God’s sister from destroying the world. I appeared in the woods, and Dean found me. He took me back to a bunker, where they lived. A man was there that I didn’t recognize. I pulled a gun on him. Dean told me to put it down and hugged the man. That was Castiel. Then, Cas told him that Sam was kidnapped by this British hunter agency.” Mary suddenly felt guilty for all that transpired as far as that was concerned. John would be mad at her after she told that story, no doubt about it. “More on that another time. We got Sam back, and I spent weeks trying to understand my sons and this man that kept helping them. All I knew was that, every time Cas was away, Dean would be anxious, fiddling around with something in his pocket. I didn’t learn until much later that the something in Dean’s pocket was a wedding ring.” Mary pursed her lips, tamping down her emotions. “Also, more on that another time. A whole bunch of stuff happened, a portal to another world opened, and I was dragged into it with Lucifer.” At John’s shock, Mary said, “yeah. That Lucifer. I escaped from him, got captured again, and was rescued by Jack.” Mary explained, “he’s an angel-human hybrid that Dean and Cas raised.” John nodded and motioned for her to continue. He was clearly enraptured. “So, we got back to Earth, and I realized that I didn’t belong there. Sam understood, but Dean took it hard. I came back to Heaven anyway, and I was watched over by Jack and Cas.”

Mary was quiet, and John asked, “Castiel did that for you?”

“I learned about both Dean and Sam from him,” Mary said. “He became a messenger of sorts between us. He’s since won me over and I love him like a son.”

With Mary’s story concluded, John mused, “the more I hear about him, the more curious I get.”

The suggestion Mary thought of but chose not to pose aloud hung in the air between them.

John understood anyway. “I’d like to meet him, yes. All he’s done is observe me stoically and fight some demons in front of me. I’d like to know more.”

Mary beamed. “You can’t pin him down, if that’s what you’re trying to do. It’s not so simple with him.”

“I’d still like to meet him.”

“I’ll ask him,” Mary said, “but I can’t promise he’ll say yes.”

“Of course not.” John exhaled deeply. “I’ll go, then.”

John detailed an instance when he caught Dean and Sam launching fireworks on the Fourth of July. He had never told them that he saw them. Dean and Sam were having so much fun setting off fireworks in an open field that John didn’t want to ruin the moment for them. John said that it was one of the few times Dean and Sam acted like kids, despite being young teenagers when the event took place.

Mary smiled at the recounting of a good time in Dean and Sam’s lives. She was glad her boys had happy memories like that.

Mary took her leave, finding Dean and Castiel waiting a few cells away, their expressions incredibly curious.

She supposed she had talked to John for longer than expected.

Mary said, “we were telling stories. He’d like to meet you, Cas.”

Castiel quirked an eyebrow. “What?”

“No,” Dean said shortly.

Cas looked at his husband’s clenched jaw, bowed head, and fiery eyes. “I can handle myself.”

“I know.”

Mary watched Castiel read her son’s expression like a book. She would have spent an entire day puzzled by it.

Cas mentioned once that Dean’s temper used to be difficult to manage. It was a trait, Mary was sad to note, that Dean shared with John.

Castiel said, “I understand. Okay?”

What he understood, Mary didn’t know.

Dean looked into Cas’s eyes, the tension leaving his shoulders, his expression smoothing out. “Okay. Later.”

Mary knew there was something she wasn’t getting about them. Something that wasn’t quite adding up. They weren’t a regular married couple. Besides the obvious reasons why they weren’t, there was a connection between Dean and Cas that Mary couldn’t understand.

Maybe she wasn’t meant to.

Dean and Castiel joined hands and acknowledged Mary. She cast her thoughts aside and walked out of the prison with them.

————

Dean and Castiel fleshed out the mental conversation they had at the prison in their cabin.

Cas assured Dean he could handle himself, and Dean expressed that he had reservations.

Castiel understood why Dean didn’t want him to be alone with John. Dean had told Cas his viewpoint one night, when Dean’s mind wouldn’t shut up and let him sleep.

Cas said Dean’s unspoken reservations aloud. “Despite the civil conversation you had with your father, you still hold a grudge and don’t trust him yet. I understand why. This is your way of protecting me from the only person you’re afraid of. You don’t want to get too close to him, and you don’t want anyone else to, either. Especially your mother. I think it’s sweet you’re trying to keep distance between me and your father. You don’t want the person you hate next to the person you love. That’s what you said, right?”

Dean nodded. Soda appeared for some attention. While the couple gathered their thoughts, they pet Soda for a moment. The celestial dog then disappeared outside the back door to wander in the woods.

Castiel said softly, “I won’t talk to him if you really don’t want me to.”

Dean sighed. He knew it was wrong to bar Cas from something he was open to trying. “I think it’s brave of you to do this. I’m not one hundred percent on board, but if you’re willing to try this, I would be a fool to stop you.”

Castiel huffed out a laugh. His husband knew him well. “You want to be nearby, don’t you?”

“I...would like to monitor the conversation, yes.” Dean blushed in embarrassment. “Never mind. I know that’s stupid.”

“Nothing you ever do, say, or think,” Cas emphasized, “is stupid, Dean.” Dean’s breath hitched at the compliment. Castiel knew that was one of Dean’s biggest insecurities. Cas tried to remind him of how smart he was as often as possible. Cas acquiesced, “I’ll allow you to listen in. I have no problem with it.”

“Alright.” Dean took Cas’s hands. “Thank you for humoring me. I love you.”

“I love you too. Now,” Cas stood up, taking Dean with him, “how about we stop thinking about this for a little while?”

One side of Dean’s mouth quirked upwards, his eyes darkening. “You hitting on me, darlin’?”

“I am,” Cas said boldly. 

Dean’s smile transformed into a grin. 

————

“Sing me something.”

Cas raised an eyebrow. “What?”

His voice heavy with exhaustion, Dean said, “you’ve never sung me to sleep before.” Dean rested his head on Cas’s chest, listening to Cas’s false thumping heartbeat. “I sang for you. Now you sing for me.”

Cas sighed and began.

...Honey you are a rock upon which I stand. And I come here to talk, I hope you understand. That green eyes, yeah the spotlight, shines upon you. And how could anybody deny you?...

Dean smiled wanly at the familiar song, shutting his eyes and getting comfortable on Cas’s chest. Cas sang it in such a hushed tone that Dean felt like he was being eased into unconsciousness.

...I came here with a load, and it feels so much lighter now I met you. And honey you should know that I could never go on without you, green eyes…

Dean drew a heart on Cas’s rib. He let Cas’s gorgeous voice wash over him like a beach wave caressing bare feet.

...Honey you are the sea upon which I float. And I came here to talk, I think you should know. That green eyes, you’re the one that I wanted to find. And anyone who tried to deny you must be out of their mind…

Dean felt himself drifting, Cas’s voice his anchor as he was dropped into the sea of sleep.

...Because I came here with a load, and it feels so much lighter since I met you. And honey you should know that I could never go on without you. Green eyes, green eyes... 

Dean’s last thought was of how much he loves his husband. He sent it to Cas through their bond, a soft hum reverberating around Cas’s chest. The last thing Dean heard as he fell asleep was the last line of the song.

...Honey you are the rock upon which I stand...

————

Dean awoke to the sound of a heartbeat beneath his ear, a strong chest against his cheek, and a hip underneath his splayed hand.

Dean felt warmth pool in his stomach, a burst of love tingling through his veins. He smiled against the body that he was more familiar with than his own.

Dean used to detest mornings. He couldn’t live without his cup of coffee. Most of the time, he wouldn’t even speak until the cup was finished and the caffeine alerted his brain. Cas used to call him an angry bear for this express reason. His husband, back when he was just a friend, quickly learned not to disturb Dean when he first regained consciousness. Cas learned to exercise patience, and not to inform Dean on events until his coffee was done.

When they started dating, Dean did a complete one-eighty. On nights when Cas was beside him, Dean was actually happy to wake up. He would occasionally wake himself early to see if Cas was still there, if he had truly stayed, if he had even moved a muscle since they fell asleep. Dean couldn’t believe that Cas would do such a thing for him, stay by his side all night even though angels didn’t need much sleep. The first few months they were together, Dean would wake up in awe that such a stunning creature was in his bed, and chose this.

Dean’s happiness in the mornings had not diminished, even after all this time. Whenever Cas was there with him, Dean was overwhelmed with joy and love. Dean felt happiest, though, when he woke up on mornings after they made love.

Which had become almost every night in Heaven, Dean was pleased to note.

He had no complaints. Cas had effectively shut Dean’s mind up for the entire night.

But awareness was slowly creeping in on him. 

Cas would want to talk to John, today.

A deep exhale from above Dean’s head quieted him.

Cas was waking up.

As always, Cas ran his hand up and down Dean’s spine, Dean shivering involuntarily. He chuckled at the gesture, tilting his head up. Dean looked into the eyes of the man he loves and murmured, “good morning, darlin’.”

Cas’s hand moved to Dean’s hair, ruffling it. “Good morning, beautiful.”

————

Balthazar and Jack appeared at Dean and Castiel’s Heaven an hour later.

“Monster number two is here,” Balthazar said. “Sound off the battle trumpets.”

Dean and Castiel prepared.

————

“Oh, shit,” Dean commented.

What what supposed to be a single rugaru was actually a pack of them.

The rugaru had been busy. It had turned five other people, creating a small pack of creatures.

“At least they’re easy to kill,” Balthazar said, materializing a demon blade. “Let’s go, gents.”

“Be sure to stab it through the brain with that,” Dean said to Balthazar.

“Gotcha.” Balthazar took aim at a rugaru, the pointy end of the blade being thrown right in the middle of the creature’s forehead. It died with a thunderous screech.

That got the pack’s attention.

Jack asked Cas, “want to do the honors?”

Cas glanced at Dean. He nodded in assent.

Castiel materialized a flamethrower. He flicked it on, shouldering the weight of such a powerful weapon with ease.

Dean’s libido flicked on like a light switch, but he cast it aside.

It was just his gorgeous husband holding a very dangerous weapon towards some charging rugarus. That was all.

Dean swallowed thickly and cast a demon blade in his hand for protection. He didn’t really need it, but he wanted to look scary too. He had to keep up with his husband somehow.

The rugarus were close by now, charging with all their speed. Cas didn’t even bat an eye, taking aim with his flamethrower.

Dean, Balthazar, and Jack watched as Castiel torched the five rugarus so efficiently that they were burned to a crisp. Like stone statues, the rugarus crumbled to ash, littering the ground.

Cas clicked off the flamethrower and made it disappear, his expression drawn.

It was one of the sexiest things Dean had ever seen.

Castiel said airily, “that was fun. One left, right?”

Balthazar replied with an affirmative, all of them still taken aback at how badass Cas could be.

————

Castiel decided to show Dean more areas of Heaven the next day. Specifically, an area of Heaven that Cas used to frequent when he still hunted with Dean and Sam.

Heaven’s library was the largest in the universe, containing a copy of every book ever written. Castiel couldn’t wait until Sam saw this, but Dean thought it was cool too.

Dean always came off as the kind of guy who didn’t like to read, but it was essential when he was a hunter. When Sam wasn’t there to pick on him, Dean read quite often. Books became a comfort whenever Cas would go away for extended periods of time. The smell of the old dusty pages reminded Dean of Cas due to all the time the former seraphim spent in the bunker library.

Heaven’s library was a maze, the likes of which Dean had never seen before. It was a wonder no one got lost in there.

Cas stopped them at the shelf filled with monster information books. They leaned on opposite bookcases. Dean was reminded of when Cas was cursed by a witch and temporarily looked like a woman. Cas was gorgeous: wavy black hair in a swinging ponytail, an athletic yet delicate build, long legs like a model.

Clothes that accentuated every part of Cas’s body.

Dean shook himself out of the memory. It was strange imagining Cas as a woman. Mostly because, if Cas initiated something more than a kiss, Dean would go along with it.

“...wraiths, books on ghosts, books on those Jefferson Starship things, books on werewolves…”

Dean tuned back in to Cas’s overview on monster books.

“...and over here is the books on mythological creatures. We’ve been using them quite a lot, lately.” Cas pulled the spine of a book with a shiny golden cover. “We have to keep getting this one out. I’m glad there’s only one monster left. It’s quite silly having someone keep coming down here to retrieve this book and then put it back. It’s become a constant cycle.” Cas blushed, realizing he was rambling. “Sorry. I’m like Gabe, sometimes. I’ll be quiet.”

Dean smiled kindly. “Keep going. I love seeing you all excited.”

Cas blushed harder, putting the book back on the shelf. “I’ve missed my books more than I thought.” He swayed on his feet a little, running a hand through his hair. “Remember when we’d be all in tune?” Cas amended, “well, we’re always in tune. I mean in the bunker library. When we’d, um-”

“Read, switch off, and check for key words?”

“Yeah,” Cas breathed. “This is what, um, this place reminds me of.”

Cas wasn’t one to be so flustered and fidgety and awkward. Something was going on here.

Dean zoned in on the problem instantly. “You’re nervous about talking with my father tomorrow.”

Cas sighed. 

“You don’t have to. I’m not forcing you to.”

“I still want to,” Cas said. “But I never expected to be in this…situation.”

“Join the club.”

Cas huffed and leaned against a bookcase. “I’m afraid that he’ll...I don’t know. Revert back to his old ways. That he’ll listen to all of us and stick to his beliefs.”

Dean crossed his arms. He had the same fears. “If he does that, he’s gone.”

Cas bit his lip and nodded. “I’d be on your side.”

“You’re my husband.” Dean smiled wanly to lighten the mood. “Isn’t it some sort of marriage code that you support me no matter what?”

Cas exhaled through his nose, his form of a laugh in this tense situation. “I suppose I’ve done this to myself. I’d be disappointed in myself if I didn’t at least talk with him.”

Dean closed the distance between them, taking Cas’s hands. He said softly, “I’ll be nearby. I’ll be there in any way you need me to be. I’ll send you cute little mental messages, like texts with heart emojis.”

Cas snorted, but smiled. “I never understood emojis.”

“Me neither, darlin’. But that’s not the point.”

“I got it.”

As Dean leaned in to kiss Cas, a Scottish voice said, “are you seriously about to snog in the library?”

Dean turned his face away from Cas’s, looking at Balthazar angrily. He glanced at Cas, and saw that he was smiling amusedly at the interruption.

“Yes,” Cas replied. “Are you seriously interrupting my,” he mimicked Balthazar’s accent, “snog in the library?”

Dean chuckled to distract from the fact that, wow, Cas imitating accents was kind of hot. He had forgotten, and he wanted Cas to do that again right now.

Cas leaned an inch away from Dean — since their bodies were still pressed together — and asked his older brother, “what do you want?”

“Not to see that,” Balthazar said, motioning to them both. He pulled a silver book from a shelf and held it up. “This. Bye now.”

The archangel spun around and flew away, leaving the couple alone again.

They looked into each other’s eyes and burst out laughing.

“That was a little mortifying,” Dean admitted between chuckles.

Cas laughed into Dean’s chest, looping his arms around Dean’s neck for leverage. He muffled, “you kept your cool. That was good.”

Their laughs tapered off, and they looked at one another again.

“I can’t believe we went through such trouble hiding our relationship,” Dean said, “when your brother could have just found us about to kiss in a library at any time.”

“I didn’t think he ever came to the library, if I’m being honest.”

The couple laughed. They were silent for a moment, the last remnants of mirth hanging in the air.

“Things are gonna be fine,” Dean said. “Alright?”

Cas nodded, and pressed his lips against Dean’s.

————

Dean waited until they were both falling asleep to mention it. “You looked hotter than that flamethrower you were holding earlier.”

Dean was hoping Cas didn’t hear such a silly utterance.

Cas’s laughs into the pillow were evidence to the contrary.

Dean waited patiently for Cas to get ahold of himself. When Cas did, he lifted his head from the pillow. 

Dean was struck dumb by the image presented before him. Cas’s hair stuck up every which way, his miles of tan skin glowed ethereally in the lamplight, and his eyes were a lively blue.

Dean would never get used to seeing Cas this way. He didn’t ever want to.

Cas asked, “are you trying to get a second round out of me?” Cas raised an eyebrow. “Or is this the third?” He smirked with a cocky air about him.

Dean loves that look. He could drown in his husband’s confidence.

“What if I was?”

Cas’s eyes grew dark, that smirk glued to his expression. “You’re lucky I’m in the mood tonight.”

Dean lifted the sheets. “C’mere, darlin’.”

Cas plastered himself on top of Dean, the couple’s lips slotting together for the hundredth time that day.

————

“I’ll be right here,” Dean murmured in Cas’s ear. “Take a breath, gorgeous.”

John’s cell was right next to the empty one Dean was sitting by. Cas inhaled and exhaled, breathing in Dean’s natural pine tree scent. The familiar smell grounded Cas as he looked into Dean’s eyes.

“Ready?”

“Yes,” Cas replied.

————

Castiel materialized a chair across from the cell and sat. He wondered if his jeans, tee, and gray peacoat were acceptable enough.

John appeared from the shadows, a look of disbelief on his face. “I honestly didn’t think you’d come.”

“I think it’s expected I meet the in-laws,” Cas said neutrally. “I’m Castiel.”

“John.” Dean’s father stood close to the bars. “I’ve heard a lot about you.”

“Good things?”

“Overwhelmingly. It got me curious.”

“Okay.” Cas kept his posture straight, crossing his legs and reminding himself not to fidget. He double checked that his walls and shields were erected within his mind. “Fire away.”

“Are you really an angel?”

“I was,” Castiel answered. “A seraphim.”

John racked his brain. “In the Bible, that’s a high ranking angel.”

“Yes. But, in reality, it means I am a warrior angel.”

That intrigued John. “There are warrior angels?”

“Of course. It’s like the military; seraphim are taught to fight and are ranked based on skill.”

John’s eyes widened. “I’ve found something we have in common already. Were you high ranking?”

“Yes. Almost as high ranking as archangels.”

“Is your brother an archangel?”

Of course John would know about Balthazar. Cas replied, “yes. My other brother was too.”

“Gabriel,” John recalled.

“Yes. He was once one of the most powerful beings in the universe. But those times are gone.”

“He gave it up like you?”

“Yes.” Castiel chose to tack on, “for Sam.”

John pursed his lips. “How did that work, exactly?”

Cas exhaled through his nose. “Dean and I were a couple first. Sam and Gabe tried to steal our thunder.”

Amusement reached John’s eyes. It wasn’t the answer he was expecting, but he didn’t pry more on the topic. “How did you meet?”

Castiel felt a nudge in the back of his mind. 

Dean.

Dean sent a mental message: “You can tell him. You’re doing great, darlin’.”

Cas said nonchalantly, “I pulled Dean out of Hell. He was confused as to why, so he found out how to summon an angel. I showed up and he stabbed me in the chest. I broke his knife and talked with him.”

“He...stabbed you.”

“It wasn’t a very nice hello, I know.”

John’s mouth quirked upwards. “That sounds like my son, alright. Did you two become friends after that?”

“Yes. Best friends.”

“Who took the leap then? Past friendship?”

Castiel replied, “Dean.”

“Wow. That’s…”

“Uncharacteristic of him, yes.”

John studied Cas for a beat. Cas figured that John was skeptical about his knowledge on Dean.

Speaking of Dean, he sent: “That was rude, gorgeous.”

Cas sent: “I’m proud of you, beautiful.”

Castiel saw Dean flustered in the corner of his eye. That was Cas’s best tactic for changing the subject between them. It always worked.

John asked, “how long have you been married?”

Cas wasn’t sure how long he had been in Heaven with Dean. He hadn’t been keeping track of time like he normally did. 

Castiel knew his answer was about to change everything in John’s mind. 

He said, “we stopped counting after fifty years.”

Cas watched John’s eyes shift to a million different emotions at once. Guilt, sadness, surprise. Guilt for all he has done to hurt his sons. Sadness for not being able to watch his sons grow as people. Surprise at how much John had truly missed in Dean and Sam’s lives.

“Fifty years,” John breathed. “My God.”

“We’re old, I know. I try not to think about it.”

Cas heard Dean laughing softly. Castiel chanced a fond glance at his husband. Dean smiled sweetly. Castiel turned back towards John, and realized that he saw the exchange.

Good.

“Is Dean over there?” John asked, trying to look to his left past the bars.

“Yes. You know how he is.” Cas shrugged. “He gets concerned.”

Dean sent: “Oh, hush.”

Cas sent a burst of affection towards Dean, a small smile reaching one side of his mouth. He schooled it back quickly, but John still saw the gesture. 

John’s curiosity was eating at him, Cas could tell. John asked, “do you love my son? Truly?”

Dean sent: “You don’t have to answer that.”

Castiel answered it. “Completely.”

He sensed Dean’s end of the bond bubble up in happiness. 

John asked, “did you really give up everything for my son?”

Dean was surprisingly quiet at the prospect of this question. Cas took advantage of the silence in his mind and replied to John, “everything. Without a second thought.”

Cas heard Dean’s breath hitch. He purposefully didn’t look to his side. He kept his eyes on John, trying to seem transparent and honest.

John must have believed him. He was silent for a moment.

Castiel hoped the information he divulged stuck in John’s head. He knew Dean, Mary, and Bobby were counting on him to make John more tolerant on differing beliefs. He hoped John could see his love for Dean and accept that he wasn’t going anywhere. Dean and Castiel Winchester were a package deal, and had been since their first kiss in a dingy motel room, their clothes and skin stained with blood.

John finally said, “I imagine Dean is growing impatient.”

Cas tilted his head a little and saw that Dean was tapping his foot against the floor nervously. He smiled at the familiar tick fondly. He said to John, “correct.”

“I’ll let you go. I know what I needed to know,” John said, standing up and clearing his throat. “Thank you. For meeting me.”

Castiel nodded, stood up, and made his chair disappear. “I suppose I’ll see you around.” The former angel glided away, taking his first real breath since before the conversation began. He reached the neighboring cell, where Dean waited.

Dean stood up and took Cas’s hands. He murmured, “you did good, darlin’. Really good.”

Castiel murmured back, “let’s get out of here.”

————

When Dean appeared wearing a form-fitting standard suit, Castiel furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. “What’s going on?”

“I,” Dean said with a smile, “am taking you out for dinner.”

Cas stood up from the couch, Soda whining in protest. Castiel scratched behind the dog’s ear absentmindedly, his eyes wide. “What ever for?”

Dean walked towards Cas, halting an arm’s length from him. “For being a lovely husband.” Dean kissed Cas’s forehead, a gesture that Cas usually reserved for Dean. Castiel removed his hand from Soda’s fur. Dean played with the hem of Cas’s tee and said, “go get dressed, Cas. Pick something pretty.”

After brushing a hand along Soda’s head, Castiel obliged.

————

Why did Dean always heart stop in these situations?

Hell, even his false heart skipped a beat upon seeing Cas in the suit he had fashioned for himself.

Dean had kept it simple on purpose. Creating and editing and fashioning fancy clothes in Heaven was a bit complicated. He just knew the basics, but Cas knew everything there was to know about such things.

Cas did not disappoint with his suit. He never did.

His suit jacket and pants were a shining blue, bright and loud and a perfect match for his eyes when they were full of mirth. His white dress shirt and blue tie were simple, reminding Dean of Cas’s usual look minus his tan trench coat. The slight gel that Cas swiped through his hair was already losing its shape, strands of raven hair falling across his forehead.

Just as Dean liked him.

Cas approached Dean, who was stroking Soda’s fur. Dean watched in a trance as Cas moved, finally leaving Soda on the couch and meeting his husband in the middle.

They stood a breath away from each other.

Dean rested a hand on Cas’s cheek. “Wow,” he breathed.

Cas blushed. “Like it?” He asked hesitantly, his voice uncharacteristically soft.

Dean stared into Cas’s eyes and replied, “it’s beautiful. You’re beautiful.”

“I’m glad you think so.” Cas smiled. “Where are you taking me?”

————

Dean took Castiel to a restaurant cube in Heaven. It was rarely used, a secret among angels. 

The fancy restaurant consisted of tables for two, and was normally used for meetings. But, since times had changed, it was hardly used at all. Thus, Dean and Cas decided to make it a secret date spot. It was a place just between them they could go to if they didn’t want to be disturbed.

This was the first time they were using it. Dean wanted to wait for a special occasion. This was as good a time as any.

Dean and Castiel sat across from each other at the table, a lit candle between them. It painted a picturesque scene, one the couple hadn’t been treated to often. Their dates used to be in diners, run down areas, in the privacy of their own home. 

“I don’t think we’ve ever been on a proper date like this before,” Dean said softly. He stared down at the small screen that acted as a menu. He could choose whatever he wanted, and it would appear. Whoever thought of that was genius. 

A sliver of guilt speared through Dean’s heart. Why hadn’t they ever done this before? It was Dating 101 stuff. Things every couple was supposed to do.

Castiel cleared his throat pointedly. Dean looked up at him. Cas smiled softly. “Better late than never, right?”

Dean couldn’t help but smile back. “Yeah. Right.”

**Author's Note:**

> More mythology is coming in the next update in a few days. Kudos and comments are appreciated!


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